Accept what is
Most people have a favourite cup.
There are some things in my life that I hope are around as long as I am. This includes my delicate teacup, bought several years ago from a gift shop in Pemberton, Western Australia. I'm very careful with it because I don't want it to break.
In his book, The Wise Heart, Jack Kornfield tells a story about his meditation master, Ajahn Chah, who held up a fine Chinese teacup and said something that surprised Jack:
‘To me this cup is already broken.’
Then he explained what he meant:
'Because I know its fate, I can enjoy it fully here and now. And when it’s gone, it’s gone.’
On first reading, this approach to life is strange.
Imagining that what I value is smashed is not what I usually do. But the more I think about it, the more sense it makes.
It's like acceptance - beforehand.
When I accept that one day my favourite cup may be - or will be - smashed, I appreciate it right now.
I notice its elegant shape and exquisite handle, the delicate painting of birds and flowers, the way it feels as I hold it and as I sip. I may not always have it, but I have it now, and what a joy it is!
At Evergreen this year, the basketball post and hoop fell over in high winds and will need to be replaced before the grand-kids turn up to play. Terracotta pots have cracked and roses are losing their blooms. My best pair of walking boots developed a hole. Last week a garden arch rusted and snapped. One of my favourite old books, Gift From the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh, is turning brown. The binding is crumbling and the pages are held together by a rubber band. I take great care turning the pages, knowing that it may not be with me for much longer.
These events are teaching me that nothing physical lasts. As Ajahn Chah implied, the best way to live is to accept this fact beforehand and appreciate things while they're still around.
If, one day, my favouite cup slips from between my ageing fingers and smashes into more pieces than I can count, I will accept that, because there's no point in doing anything else.
As Eckhart Tolle has said:
The greatest difficulty is the mental resistance to things that arise, and the underlying assumption that they should not.
I can't un-smash a smashed cup.
But I can appreciate it while it's here.
This is a close-up of my favourite cup. The photo doesn't do the artwork justice.
With love, Marlane
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